Thursday, April 17, 2014

More Bad News

I got a call from an OB nurse to give me the final results of my tests yesterday. There is a gestational sac and a yolk sac, which means for sure it is not ectopic, which is good, but it is irregularly shaped and lying incredibly low in my uterus. When I asked her what that meant she said, "most likely impending miscarriage." That information combined with the low hcg result and the cramping and bleeding the odds are incredibly stacked against this being a viable pregnancy. I asked her in her experience what she thinks and she said, "Not viable, but I've seen crazier things happen so you can be cautiously optimistic." I don't think I can say I feel very optimistic, but I can't get myself to let go of the sliver of hope that somehow this baby will miraculously surprise everyone and grow to a healthy baby. I will take the hcg test on Saturday, but there is a good chance that I will start bleeding before then. I just don't want to be strung along here. If it's going to miscarry at any point, might as well be now. I read some stories online of women who had similar situations who's baby grew and hcg doubled for a few weeks only to eventually end in miscarriage anyway. No thanks. No false hope, please! More to come later.

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